Fear!

She was deeply engrossed in reading a novel, for a moment her eyelashes bowed, she all of sudden saw his face which wasn’t vague at all. Though he wasn’t in the room his presence was so prominent all across. She felt his eyes on her with that never ending straight from heart intent gaze as always. It was a momentary lapse she lost her all attention to thinking about him prolonging it to beyond times. These feelings were new to her. She had never been addicted to company of anyone rather than books. Infatuations or cravings for particular person or thing never had been her fixation. Cherishing and missing memories was the thing she pursued instead. She gazed at clock realizing it was past three in morning, and this was totally recent that she was acutely missing him. Before meeting him she always conveyed time was the important factor in deepening bonds, but her theory and perspectives were lost the instant they first connected being in that never ending stunning drizzle. Time had eventually made her introvert, habituating her to stay alone, or being in company of in-human forms. But being with him, desiring of being someone’s seed sprouted instantly. He had constantly nourished that plant of feelings growing inside her. She never was able to comprehend or define that sparks flickering from the very first day, which existed between them. Both of them knew that sooner or later they would turn into smothering fire which would not be ever extinguished. Instantaneous linked up with him has always scared her. She hadn’t disclosed herself this much to anyone else in whole life; with him it was easy to speak what her heart out. But the fear of losing him panicked her every single moment. Influential past always felt trails whenever she thought about him. Every single person to whom she was connected deeply always left voids in her life. She knew it, as each time destiny would play its cards but also she was sure that if it happens with them, she won’t ever be able to gather herself again.