Letters To My First Love!
Dear Love, I woke up again! I wish I were happy! Scratching that I WISH I WERE HAPPY WITH YOU! Each night I fall either asleep wishing I died or wake up safe and happy with you beside me but that never happens. It is a ritual now to cry to sleep waking up endless times to nightmares with increased intensity each night. The dark circles have deepened even more expressing my eyes are dying to see you once again. I long for you and though I can be the utter ruthless manipulative bitch when it comes down to self-restraint in expressing my feelings. I cannot help it I was been raised to suppress and live at each moment of my life. My wish of dying justifies I need a clean slate to write on! No person will ever have guts to accept me with my rebellious outrageous past tagging along. Even you were not that brave ever. You are the only one who got into a little depth in my demons. At this point, I am certain that either I want you to accept me as it is or to completely forget each